GREAT TRUTHS FROM SMALL CHILDREN
    
* No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
 
* When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your       
  hair.
  
* If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the
  second person.
     
* Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
 
* You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
 
* Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.

* Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
 
* Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
 
* Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
 
* School lunches stick to the wall.
 
* You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
 
* Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
 
* It's hard to unlearn a bad word.
 
* Ask "Why?" until you understand.
     
* It's easier to see the mistakes on someone else's paper.
 
* A pencil without an eraser may as well just be a pen.

* It's only fun to play school when you're the teacher.

* Sometimes the best one in the play has the fewest lines.

* Twelve is a lot older than eight.
 
* Don't say that the "Last One is a Rotten Egg" unless you're
  absolutely sure there's a slow kid behind you.
 
* Crawling still gets you there.
     
* If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.
 
* Your room gets smaller as you get bigger.
 
* You can't start over just because you're losing the game.
 
* A snow day is more fun than a vacation day.
 
* All libraries smell the same.
     
* If you want someone to listen to you, whisper it.

* Sometimes you have to take the test before you've finished studying.
 
* Silence can be an answer.
     
* Ask where things come from.
     
* If you throw a ball at someone, they'll probably throw it back

* Don't nod on the phone